THE PREEMINENCE OF JESUS IN PARENTING
Part I - A Word to the Kids
Colossians 3:20
Kids say the darndest things...
-Family greeting pastor after church, junior says “my dad says mom is a pagan”...why?...”she serves up burnt offerings for supper”
-Kid was making faces at others in Sunday School...teacher who was sr. adult lady says “when I was your age I was told my face would freeze like that”...kid says “well you can’t say you weren’t warned.”
-Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong...”If I got into a man’s pocket and took his wallet with his money w/o him knowing it what would I be?”...kid raised hand and said “you’d be his wife!”
Kids can also do the darndest things...
Minister walking down the street, sees kid trying to ring a door bell but can’t reach it...he stops to help, rings it for him, and says “what now?”...kid says “now we run!”
Well let’s look at what they should do...Col. 3:20...
“Children” - “Tekna” - often refers to small children but can also mean any living in the home under the instruction and authority of their parents. That means this directive would apply to small kids, teenagers, and essentially anyone living at home under their parent’s roof. The trend today especially among young adults is to finish school and stay at home or go to college then return home. In some cases it is precipitated by poor job market or other extenuating circumstances, and sometimes it is simply a failure to grow wings and fly. If you are a parent with an adult child at home then the rule should be simple: UNDER YOUR ROOF, UNDER YOUR AUTHORITY. Anything less is doing them a disservice. For the adult child, you should accept this or ... leave!
3 contextual observations....
1. God cares about our relationships to one another. If Jesus is in us, it should show in how we deal with one another...
2. Paul is addressing children in Christian homes. That is the direction this message will take although I will make some comments at the end about children in non-Christian homes. Children, I know there is always a natural tension that exists between you and your parents. Every child but one (Jesus) has had to deal with that. Most children at one time or another have thought “I have the worst, dumbest, unfairest, lamest, parents in the world!” But let me tell you something, if you were born into a Christian home and raised by godly parents - YOU ARE BLESSED!!! Whether you are 5, 15, 25, 55, 75 you ought to give thanks regularly to God for putting you there. There are lots that don’t have what you do.
3. Paul is speaking directly to the children. This letter would have been read aloud in a church worship gathering. That means the kids would have been present.
I. Jesus Wants You to Obey Your Parents
For kids a lot has changed over the years....games we played....how you got around...how you communicated....sports/equipment....but one thing hasn’t changed: Jesus still wants you to obey your parents...
“obey” - hupakoute - hypo is under, akouo is to hear, understand, and then do.
So that means you must accept that your parents have authority over you, when they speak you listen, and what they say, you do.
1. The Blessings of Obedience
Exodus 20:12 - “Honor your father and your mother that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.”
Ephesians 6:3 - “that it may be well with you...”
Proverbs 3:1-2 - “My son do not forget my law, But let your heart keep my commands; for length of days and long life and peace they will add to you.”
Proverbs 1:8-9 - “My son hear the instruction of your father and do not forsake the law of your mother; for they will be a graceful ornament on your head.”
Kids, can you imagine how much more peace would be in your home if you would simply obey your parents instead of warring against them. If you cleaned your room when asked, did your homework, came home on time, wore the clothes they approved of, broke of that relationship they don’t approve of...
Here’s another thought...the more obedient you are the more trust you build with your parents. I’ve known some parents who have few rules and no curfews, because their kids have proven themselves to be responsible and they respect their parents enough to not abuse the leniency they are granted.
2. The Curse of Disobedience
Deut. 21:18-21 - “If someone has a stubborn and rebellious son who does not obey his father and mother and will not listen to them when they discipline him, his father and mother shall take hold of him and bring him to the elders at the gate of his town. They shall say to the elders, “This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us. He is a glutton and a drunkard.” Then all the men of his town are to stone him to death. You must purge the evil from among you. All Israel will hear of it and be afraid.”
Proverbs 30:17 - “The eye that mocks his father and scorns his obedience to his mother, the ravens of the valley will pick it out, and the young eagles will eat it.”
This verse says there will be consequences to disobedience. Every adult in this place could testify to that today couldn’t you?!!?
Prov. 13:24 - “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly.”
This verse says you can expect discipline or punishment when you don’t obey. Your parents aren’t doing you any favors if they don’t discipline. When they do, it is because they love you.
2 Tim. 3:1-4 - “But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God.”
This verse says that disobedience is a characteristic of an ungodly person.
It does not get any more black and white, right or wrong in the Bible than the command found in this verse. God wants you to obey your parents. Doing so leads to a blessed life, not doing it will cause problems.
II. Jesus Gives Your Parents the Wisdom to Take Care of You
“in all things” - this is the scope of their authority over you and wisdom they have.
Two thoughts that may shock every teenager here:
1. “Your parents really do know what is best for your life!”
For kids this starts early and seems to really manifest itself by the teenage years - you think you know more than your folks. Hey, they’re old aren’t they? Old-fashioned, out of touch, don’t know what its like to live in your generation...they don’t know how to text, create a Facebook account, and think an iPad is something you sit on at a doctor’s office. How in the world can they possibly know what is best for your life here in 2011!?
Prov. 22:6 - “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”
“Train” - put something in the mouth, cultivate a taste - it is to teach them what they should yearn for
“child” - any age, under your roof, under your authority
“way” - speaks to a natural bent that God has uniquely created them for
This verse means God has made you for a special purpose and has given your parents the wisdom and ability to lead you toward it. They won’t know all that God has for you, but they know how to lead you to his trough to drink from Him.
Listen when they tell you don’t hang out with that group, don’t date that person, slow down, get a job, respect your elders, quit jumping on the couch, etc.
2. “Your parents are not trying to ruin your life!”
If they love Jesus then they love you. They want to see you do your best. They want to see you not make the mistakes and suffer like they did. (matt. 7:9-11)
Is it possible they will make a mistake? Not only possible but guaranteed!!! They are not perfect. If you will pray for them, humble yourself under them, and do your best to obey you may discover they are far closer to perfect than you originally thought.
III. Jesus is Happy When You Obey Your Parents
“well pleasing to the Lord” - Simple translation: Jesus is happy when his kids obey their parents.
This gets to the heart of the matter. Who are you most concerned with pleasing? Yourself or Jesus? This whole obedience thing is a spiritual issue. Kids that are growing in Jesus will strive to obey their parents. Those who don’t, won’t, and the cycle continues. If you don’t view Jesus as your authority, you won’t view your parents as authority, school teachers...bosses...police...and by then you have gone down a disastrous road.
Parents look at your kids whatever their age (5, 10, 15, 25) if they are not obeying you, it is a spiritual issue that is only going to grow worse. Their hope is Jesus.
Kids, teenagers, adult children, there is nothing more important in life than your relationship to Jesus. Nothing else will matter, nothing else will help if we don’t get this right first.
Some of you grew up / are growing up in non-Christian homes. Your hope is Christ. He can save you, He can break the cycle so that you don’t repeat it, He can heal your wounds, He can give you more than you ever missed.
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